Forward March!

Another milestone in the treatment process-radiation #33 of 33 in the books today! Once again side effects minimal-some fatigue, a little "sunburn", and a tan-there were a lot of things on that consent form that I had to sign prior to beginning radiation treatments that God kept from me-MERCY. Thank you Lord for "crowning me with your loving kindness and tender mercies"! After radiation bloodwork-always on Tuesday of the week that chemo is scheduled(Thursday every 3 wks). Speaking of chemo...Thursday will be #8 of 17 and one of my aunts is going to fill in for daddy this time. God willing she'll be here tomorrow. I'm wondering if we're going to get any sleep tomorrow night-whenever I go visit her and my east Texas fam, she always has me rolln-idk if the chemo nurses and other chemo patients are ready LOL-more good times on the way :-) In addition to the bloodwork today, I also had a 2D echo done-basically a heart utlrasound. No worries, it's protocol due to the chemo meds I'm receiving. The cardiologist will read the data collected and provide a report but the nurse who conducted the ultrasound said that everything looked good. I've mentioned "a project" in previous posts-God has blessed me to publish my first book-"Poetic Inspirations for the Child of God" via a Christian self-publisher I'm so thankful. Here's the summary for it: Yes Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior and we’re a part of the Royal Family of God but we still have our moments: •When we feel lonely, forgotten, unloved and that no one cares about us •When we feel helpless, hopeless and like we can’t go on •When we lose sight of our true identity-who we are in Christ as well as both the blessings and burdens that come along with being one of His •When we slip up and take God’s blessings for granted and find ourselves complaining rather than thanking This book of poems is a source of inspiration and encouragement for the child of God who is striving to keep the FAITH. Side note: the time is right whenever God says so, not when everything appears to be perfect or ideal(perfect health, perfect finances, everything in our lives neat, calm and in order). God can and will do great things in our lives in spite of and if the midst of if we will go with what He says and walk by faith. God knows what He's doing-got everything planned out and is able to execute perfectly. On this past Sunday the fulfillment hour/Sunday school lesson was titled "When the Miracle Doesn't Happen". That was my testifying cue as God has blessed me to experience miracles in this particular journey of overcoming breast cancer but He has also allowed me to experience times in this journey when the miracle that I hoped for, didn't happen-I didn't want to have to have chemo, but I did-the miracle didn't happen, I didn't want to lose my hair to the point that I had to cut it off but I did-the miracle didn't happen and backing up to the diagnosis, I didn't want to hear that I had breast cancer and that it was also in atleast one lymph node but I did-the miracle didn't happen BUT multiple times God told me that He didn't want to undermine the power and strength of the testimony that He was building in my life-so even when those miracles didn't happen I still had peace in God's will. He has a purpose for every phase of this process that He has taken me through thus far. Some of the poems in the book I mentioned above would not have been written if He had not set my feet on the path of this journey. Has everyday been a wonderful day? no ma'am and no sir BUT I can say that I know for myself that God's grace is sufficient, I can say that all the good that He has caused to come out of this and in the midst of this so far outweighs the rough days uncontested/hands down and I know God to be a Keeper and a Sustainer because He's been that for me and remember some of the verses that He gave me to hold onto early on-"For we know that all things work together for the good of them that love the Lord, the called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28) and "we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us." (Romans 8:37)-He continues to show me those words manifested in my life. From the start all the way to date, He's still not given me a reason to hang my head :-) As the title of one of my poems says, "I'm Still Smiling". When we know the one that is allowing us to go through something-and not just allowing us but walking us through, is the same one that loves us, the same one who's word and promises are true, the same one who makes no mistakes, the same one who has ALL power in His hands-why not smile? When God takes us through something-pending the way we go through it (our attitude, mindset, the words we speak, actions)-we are given several opportunities-the opportunity to glorify God, to come through it with a stronger faith, the opportunity to be used by God as an instrument of encouragement to our brothers and sisters in Christ, the opportunity to be a tool for drawing unbeliever who are watching in disbelief or shocked that though you are going through- you still seem to have more peace and joy than others they know and sleeping better too. There is also the opportunity for expanded territory in the way of ministry-the more God brings us through the more people He can use us to reach-for every type of challenge and obstacle He blesses us to overcome and every battle He blesses us to win, that adds to those that we can with His help connect to. God is a good God. His plan for our lives far exceeds what we could ever think, dream or imagine but we have to trust Him. Will we have "moments"? Yes but the problem is not that we have those "moments" but rather when we decide to let them become our norm. God Bless & KTF

Last Double Treatment and Chemo #7 of 17 in the books!

Getting closer!!! After last week's radiation treatments, I only have 2 more left in this second phase. On Wednesday the plan is for the tech to take film (x-rays) and mark me up again in preparation for the last phase of radiation treatments which they refer to as the boost, where they focus the radiation on the area of my breast that has a scar from the incision made during surgery. I still have that sunburn type irriation on my shoulder area but told the doctor yesterday that I only had a couple more treatments left in that area and that I was good. She warned that it may get worse over the weekend and gave the radiation tech a heads up for the upcoming week. I guess I will find out on Monday (if God says the same), whether or not they will skip that area for that day or go ahead and treat it. Thursday was what should've been my last double treatment day (both radiation and chemo on the same day). In my usual pre-chemo visit with the nurse practitioner who works with both of oncologists, I was informed that something weird must have happened with the samples of the blood drawn earlier that week because there was no way that the results were correct, with the exception of the white blood cell count and the red blood cell count. Red blood cell count was good but white blood cell count was not where they wanted it to be so instead of receiving one neupogen shot they day after chemo, I would have to have 2 neupogen shots (one on the day after chemo which would be Friday and the second one on Monday). They also re-drew blood before getting me started with chemo this time too. The last time I had a double treatment I was tired but still blessed with enough strength to eat and then get to work but this time my strength and energy was left on "e" and I was unable to go to work but even then still blessed with life and I still had fun during the chemo as part of the time me and daddy played this game working together as a team on his notebook or ipad called lines-starting at level 65 by the time we finished-rather got to the point that we were stumped-you know when the challenge of the game is on the verge of becoming stressful because you can't get past the current level LOL- we were on level 83. BTW to make it less confusing and easier to track I'm going to start counting up rather than down with regard to the number of chemo treatments and in reference to the total number, which includes pre and post surgery rather than post surgery only. Thursday was #7 of 17. TGBTG

Update

Radiation treatment #18 of 33 completed on yesterday morning. I've noticed some changes in skin color in some of the area that's been treated via radiation. The dr. also told me in our regular Friday post radiation appointment, that I could start using that Eucerin creme that I was given a sample of but not before treatment and that there's a possibility that next week I could start to feel some irritation in the areas being treated and that they may have to give me a break, but I know God's still got me and He will do what's best-whatever that is. Next chemo scheduled for Thursday (counting down from the 13 treatments I had left post sugery, this will be #11). This morning God blessed me to run the 5k Race for the Cure. 2012 was the only other year that I've participated and that was because it was our singles ministry outreach activity for that month (marathons are not my preferred method of exercise). Often times it takes either our firsthand experience or seeing someone close to us going through it before we're moved to the point of action, support or contributing in some way to a cause that's bigger than us. Now this time it was our singles ministry outreach activity again but this time there was a deeper meaning for me-never thought I'd be in the number of women battling breast cancer but I'm thankful that God blessed me with the strength and energy to run while still in the midst of treatments and that He continues to move me closer and closer to that official "Breast Cancer Survivor". I was also blessed that some of my single sisters participated as well. One had also included my name on the list of those she was walking for which she wore on her back-I was blessed by that too. In addition to that I was introduced to a 25yr cancer survivor and then to one who was still in the midst of treatments- not official yet but like me still here and on the way-there was a special comradery. Though she told me good luck, after which I said God bless you. I know she had best of intentions in mind but I know in whom I believed (and do believe); He's the reason I'm still standing, the source of my joy and peace, and the One Who has continued to bring me through every obstacle in this journey thus far. TGBTG.